OPINION:
Surveys indicate that most people feel as if life is moving faster and faster, a sentiment that while not technically true, is usually the result of doing too much in too little time.
Part of the problem is that most Americans believe the secret to happiness is having more, going faster or working harder. In reality, happiness is a byproduct of balance.
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To be fair, finding balance is hard. Our natural tendency is to overreach, to go too far, and to want too much. It’s like the reporter who asked billionaire John D. Rockefeller “How much money is enough?” Mr. Rockefeller answered, “Just a little bit more.”
We all answer, “Just a little bit more,” in some area of life. It can be money, gambling, drugs, alcohol. For others, it’s food, shopping, or sex. For you, maybe it’s something else, but your desire for more is out of balance.
Even too much of a good thing is a bad thing. Our bodies need water but drinking too much can be fatal. Fire warms our skin – but it burns us if we get too close. Healthy people prioritize balance because they recognize that more is not always the answer to happiness. They understand if something rules your life, too much is never enough. Going faster, having more, and working harder have their place. But they also have their limitations. None of it will satisfy the deepest needs of our soul. And none of it will bring us happiness.
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My friend Dr. Al Mohler is the president of Southern Seminary. He used to serve on our board here at Focus on the Family. At times he seemed almost indefatigable. In fact, The Babylon Bee once poked some good-natured fun at him some time ago by featuring a story that Al was being taken offline for scheduled maintenance.
“The work is expected to take anywhere from four to six hours, during which time Mohler will be unavailable for tweeting, writing articles, writing books, recording podcasts, delivering speeches, participating in debates, or running the seminary,” wrote the Bee.
It was funny because it contained an element of truth. Dr. Mohler’s production is impressive. But he once told me that in his early years, he struggled to give his wife and kids his full attention. In fact, it didn’t take long for him and his wife to realize that striking a perfect balance between work and home life every single day sometimes just wasn’t possible.
That’s when Al implemented a strategy for his family you might find helpful for yours.
Instead of trying to balance every 24 hours, they decided to balance blocks of time instead.
I’ve found a similar rhythm in my own life. Some years ago, when our boys were young, I stopped taking speaking or interview opportunities during the summer. That opened up opportunities to camp and spend concentrated time with the family. I also always did my best to make sure I was home for family dinners all throughout the year.
Your schedule will be unique. Whatever you choose, the idea is to strike a balance across a specific timeframe. If, for example, you’re out of town for a week, you may not be able to interact with your family over the course of those days as fully as if you were home. That’s OK. Just make sure that, upon your return, you don’t slip right back into your normal workweek grind. Instead, refocus your attention on your family and engage with them first.
Of course, the greatest abundance we can enjoy is found in the intimacy of a good marriage, the connection of a good friendship, the love of a strong family, and the joy of an abiding faith in Jesus Christ.
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Jim Daly is president of Focus on the Family and host of its daily radio broadcast, heard by more than 6 million listeners a week on nearly 2,000 radio stations across the U.S. He also hosts the podcast ReFocus with Jim Daly.
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