OPINION:
Anger, furor and emotional pandemonium continue to dominate many progressive spaces in the wake of President-elect Donald Trump’s sweeping victory.
It’s normal for disappointment and frustration to reign after a person or party’s candidate loses, but what we’re seeing right now is a different dynamic — an infernal enigma leading some vexed by Vice President Kamala Harris’ loss to lash out in abnormal and unfortunate ways.
Emotions are running so high that some are cutting off family members who supported Mr. Trump and encouraging others to do the same. Dr. Amanda Calhoun, a psychiatry resident at Yale University, recently turned heads after she went on MSNBC and said separating from family members and friends right now might be a healthy approach.
“If you are going to a situation where you have family members, where you have close friends who you know have voted in ways that are against you … against your livelihood, it’s completely fine to not be around those people and to tell them why,” she said. “You know, to say, ‘I have a problem with the way that you voted, because it went against my very livelihood and I’m not going to be around you this holiday. I need to take some space for me.’”
But the idea that politics should pervade every facet of our being and become so tethered to our identities that we cannot speak with our ideological opponents is unhealthy. Yet it’s a natural outgrowth of the “safe space” paradigm in which so many have confined themselves.
Sadly, these ideas were recently perpetuated by Sunny Hostin, co-host of “The View,” who took to the airwaves to say she understands Dr. Calhoun’s point.
“It’s more of a moral issue for me and I think it’s more of a moral issue for other people,” she said. “We’re just — you know, I would say it was different when, let’s say, Bush got elected. You may not have agreed with his policies, but you didn’t feel like he was a deeply flawed person, deeply flawed by character, deeply flawed in morality.
“I think when people feel that someone voted not only against their families but against them and against people that they loved, I think it’s OK to take a beat.”
Such advice is not only problematic but also divisive and perilous. This guidance does nothing to help heal a deeply divided nation filled with people who appear to be suffering real and tangible mental health struggles over the outcome of the election.
Perhaps it would help people on both sides to understand what drove votes rather than assume that the selection of a candidate — based mostly on policy — is somehow a personal insult. Hearing others out with maturity and responding in love is what should be encouraged, not hiding out and avoiding situations that help build our emotive grit.
I’m an evangelical Christian who has spent more than two decades living in the secular New York City area. If I took this approach to every election and demanded people vote for me and my interests, I’d have no friends or family, yet it seems far too many are demanding such a litmus test and are either unwilling or unable to take a rational approach.
Perhaps we shouldn’t be surprised. Weeks before the election, former ABC News political journalist Mark Halperin appeared on “The Tucker Carlson Show” and issued a stunning warning. He said a win by Mr. Trump would potentially spark Democratic chaos and the “greatest mental health crisis in the history of the country.”
“I think tens of millions of people will question their connection to the nation, their connection to other human beings, and their vision of the future for themselves and their children,” Mr. Halperin told Mr. Carlson, expressing hope that Mr. Trump would recognize these struggles and act to temper the storm.
At first, I pondered whether this prediction was excessive or overblown, but in the days since the election, my social media feeds have been filled with people spewing death wishes, among other bizarre proclamations. That only intensified in the wake of the election when I posted a message to both sides of the political divide.
I wrote: “I don’t know who needs to hear this, but politics aren’t worth losing your loved ones over. Get over your insanity.”
I was inundated with hundreds of angry replies pining for my death and offering passionate defenses for cutting off loved ones who support Mr. Trump. Disagreement is fine. This went far beyond that, shedding light on the very reality Mr. Halperin warned about.
I’ve long worried about our increasing cross into the idolization and worship of politics. But the 2024 election seems to be the climax of this chaotic paradigm. Gone are the days of rational discussion, attempts to understand the other side and sensible debate.
Many liberals are choosing the path of destruction, deciding to isolate themselves in ideological cocoons rather than confront the real-world reality that not everyone thinks like them. Had Ms. Harris won, we would no doubt be having similar conversations about civility and tone, as this advice was certainly needed after the 2020 election.
Regardless, the current decision by some progressives to label more than half the country racist, misogynistic and evil for choosing Mr. Trump and, in turn, deciding to cut off and demean relatives and friends is a step beyond what is reasonable. So, what’s the path forward?
It’s important to recognize a few realities as we navigate this crisis: People are suffering. We can think that’s ridiculous and gratuitous, but it’s our reality. With that in mind, we have to find ways to come alongside others and help them understand that politics can’t define us and that familial ties and our relationships with loved ones should be protected and cherished.
We need compassion on both sides. And for those choosing to ax their loved ones over Mr. Trump’s election, take a moment to ponder what they have meant to you. Pull yourself back from your anger and recognize there are reasons people vote the way they do. And, if you can find the courage within yourself, sit down over the holidays, take a deep breath and ask those uncomfortable “why” questions with an open heart.
Stop letting politics define you. It’s a fleeting idol, and you’re better than that.
• Billy Hallowell is a digital TV host and interviewer for Faithwire and CBN News and the co-host of CBN’s “Quick Start Podcast.” He is the author of four books.
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