Being curious and not judgmental

OPINION:

“Be curious, not judgmental.”

That quote, often inaccurately ascribed to 19th-century poet Walt Whitman, is key to “sizing people up,” according to retired FBI Special Agent Chief of the Counterintelligence Behavior Analysis Program and best-selling author Robin Dreeke.

At the CIA, the best leaders under whom I served moderated, asked hard questions, prompted debate, and challenged their own assumptions. They purposely considered all viewpoints in the room without making any distinctions based on someone’s rank or job title. We planned our clandestine operations in a diverse and inclusive environment, with as close as possible to a 360-degree optic of the challenge before us.  

We were taught to be curious and to see the world with empathy through the eyes of others because our sources’ lives, and often our own, depended on it.

Matthew Kenslow, who is currently a substitute teacher while he awaits the results of applications for professor positions, is on the autism spectrum. Social and conversational skills, organizing his thoughts, and accurately interpreting facial expressions and intonation in peoples’ voices can be challenging for him. Growing up, he wanted to be accepted and “treated like a human being” without being”stared at with the strangest looks, laughed at, teased, and called a weirdo.”

Mr. Kenslow is also an advocate for being curious rather than judgmental.

Mr. Kenslow never let anything stop relentlessly pursuing his lifelong dream of becoming a teacher.  He loves music so much that he carries sheet music in case he happens upon a piano. He is also an accomplished juggler, which has become a metaphor for his determination to “persevere and never give up.” Juggling for his students, Mr. Kenslow tells them about autism, delivers his anti-bullying message, and reminds them, “if things fall in life, then pick them back up and keep going.”

For Mr. Kenslow, it’s about juggling with “different abilities,” not “disability.”

Mr. Kenslow’s life passion is giving back to his students and the exceptional freedom of opportunity his quality education afforded him.  “God has chosen me to have this condition,” Mr. Kenslow wrote, “so that I may be one of the few who could encourage and reassure others.”

Psychologists deliberately use the term “spectrum” because every person with autism has unique strengths and challenges. Colorado State University Professor Temple Grandin, one of the first people on the autism spectrum to publicly share her personal experiences, said her inability to understand “neurotypicals” made her feel like an “anthropologist on Mars.” Most folks have met people on the autism spectrum. I worked with some during my CIA career, and a member of my family is on the autism spectrum.

Mr. Kenslow went on to earn a bachelor of science degree in biochemistry. He wrote two introspective books to prove that people on the autism spectrum “can become teachers if they want to, but all their neurotypical colleagues must understand our brains.” Mr. Kenslow personifies our sacred duty to ensure all children reach their social and academic potential.

Mr. Kenslow’s message about being curious and not judgmental also applies to our highly divisive political process. More often than not, Democrats and Republicans engage derisively with one another as if they are from different planets, not voting districts.

Politicians on both sides of the aisle would do well instead to emulate Mr. Kenslow’s respect for different viewpoints and diversity of communication, especially when it comes to foreign policy, which should be devoid of acrimonious partisanship. Our country is practically split 50-50 between Democrats and Republicans. Voters should reward politicians who practice the art of compromise and do not allow the perfect to be the enemy of the good. All of us should understand what binds us together as Americans is more powerful than what divides our two political parties.

As the presidential election campaign heats up, the two major party candidates should spend more time and energy describing how they would unite our country to deal with all the wickedly challenging threats to our national security because one party seeking to go it alone, especially to score political points against the other, would doom us to failure. It’s worth remembering that Republican Sen. Arthur Vandenberg ushered in an era of bipartisan collaboration on foreign policy after World War Two, which enabled us to win the Cold War.

As Speaker Mike Johnson recently demonstrated when he led the passage of the supplemental military assistance package, Mr. Kenslow’s empathic approach is a model for escaping swampy partisan gridlock and reaching the holy grail of strong bipartisan foreign policy.

• Daniel N. Hoffman is a retired clandestine services officer and former chief of station with the Central Intelligence Agency. His combined 30 years of government service included high-level overseas and domestic positions at the CIA. He has been a Fox News contributor since May 2018.