- Tuesday, January 2, 2024

Imagine Washington Commanders offensive coordinator and assistant head coach Eric Bieniemy walking into a job interview this off-season for — let’s get crazy — a head coaching job. For illustration’s sake, let’s say there’s someone out there who still believes Bieniemy is some sort of offensive genius being held back by lack of opportunity.

Here’s what the first question might be: “What went wrong with Sam Howell at quarterback in Washington?”

Bieniemy: “Heck if I know.”

Or maybe: “Your guess is as good as mine.”

Or perhaps: “You got me.”

This was essentially the answer that Bieniemy gave reporters to this very question in his Dec. 28 press conference. It was buried beneath the avalanche of words Bieniemy piles on every week in a remarkable display of saying very little of consequence, but this one spoke volumes:

“He (Howell) just didn’t play well. And, unfortunately, you know, that happens and it’s not like anything you can put your finger on.”

Oh really? Isn’t that kind of your job?

Before anyone could stop to digest what exactly the team’s offensive coordinator said here — basically, “I don’t have a clue” — Bieniemy shifted like the running back he was in his glory days at Colorado and changed direction, talking about how backup quarterback Jacoby Brissett nearly led the team to a comeback win over the New York Jets.

“But on the flip side of that, Jacoby steps in and he sparks a rally,” Bieniemy said. “So, the good thing is that you have a great quarterback room, and those guys do a great job of supporting one another. Those guys are the biggest fans of each other. And obviously, it’s a tough situation, but I guarantee you Sam is going to be Jacoby’s biggest fan, just as Jacoby was his biggest fan moving forward.”

Bieniemy may not know what’s wrong with Howell at quarterback, but he sure can evaluate his cheerleading skills.

I know this is a sensitive subject because Bieniemy was the example held up about the NFL’s lack of opportunities for minorities hired as head coaches. He had been passed over reportedly 16 times for head coaching jobs, and his move out of Kansas City after 10 years under Andy Reid’s sizable shadow to take the job in Washington was to show the league he was head coaching material.

That has turned out to be a failed gamble, though it’s unclear if Bieniemy could have stayed on in Kansas City as offensive coordinator. They moved quickly to put Matt Nagy, who had been the offensive coordinator with the Chiefs in 2016 and 2017 before becoming head coach in Chicago, in that job.

There is a narrative that the Chiefs’ struggles this year may be related to Bieniemy’s departure. I certainly understand how those dots can be connected. NBC analyst Chris Simms believes the Chiefs’ woes can be connected to Bieniemy’s absence.

“The offense isn’t as good as last year,” Simms said on this “This is Football” podcast. “Period. It’s not. Eric Bieniemy had more creative ways to do things. There was more creative play-calling, tying plays together. And Patrick Mahomes — I believe like two weeks ago — kind of said it, too, publicly. Bieniemy was the enforcer on that offense. He was the guy who kept everybody in line and in check. And if you weren’t doing good, he got in your face and let you know it.”

OK. So Bieniemy was Reid’s Luca Brasi. What’s funny is that very reputation has been a problem in Washington, where head coach Ron Rivera (who really can’t seem to put his finger on anything) spoke in training camp of players complaining about Bieniemy’s demanding, old-school style. 

The tough-guy reputation surfaced again recently when ESPN’s John Keim said on his podcast that some players had approached Rivera to complain yet again about Bieniemy’s role.

Granted, the woeful way these players have delivered this season gives them zero credibility to stage a coup. 

But these are the players the team has as a result of the roster building by Rivera, who is in his fourth season as the personnel boss. These are the players that Bieniemy has to connect with — not alienate, as he may have done. It’s the hand you’ve been dealt. It doesn’t seem to have gotten better since training camp.

And the results on the field haven’t gotten better since last year.

There is hardly any difference in production between Bieniemy’s offense this season and the one run by Scott Turner, who was fired by Rivera after last season. In 2022, Turner’s offense was ranked 24th in the league, having put up 321 points.

Bieniemy’s offense is ranked 23rd going into the season’s final game on Sunday, scoring 319 points. 

To top Turner, Bieniemy and his offense will have to deliver more than a field goal in the season finale against a Dallas Cowboys team playing for the NFC East division title and a No. 2 seed in the playoffs when they come to FedEx Field.

You don’t have to be a concert pianist to know where to put your fingers on what went wrong with Howell and the offense. 

Bieniemy took a fifth-round 2022 draft pick with one start under his belt and tried to turn him into Dan Fouts. No team has run the ball less in the league than the Commanders, with just 342 carries – nearly 100 fewer attempts than the Cowboys. Howell needed the young quarterback’s security blanket — a running game — and Washington had the running backs to deliver it. Brian Robinson averaged 4.2 yards per carry this year, while Antonio Gibson averaged 4.1 yards per carry.

The reality is that Bieniemy has failed not just as a head-coaching candidate, but as an offensive coordinator as well — the proof is in a 4-12 record and a broken young quarterback.

Let’s finish this job interview — is there something specific as a coach that you tried new this year?

“Sometimes coach Eric Bieniemy can be very hardheaded and stubborn.”

It might help if Bieniemy didn’t think Eric Bieniemy was a whole other person.

You can hear Thom Loverro on The Kevin Sheehan Show podcast.

• Thom Loverro can be reached at tloverro@washingtontimes.com.

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