Bud Light — blech: Let the transgender consumers bail you out

OPINION:

Bud Light was already a crappy beer. But now they’re a crappy beer with a crappy public relations message that caters to a 1% population that, curiously enough, probably didn’t even drink the crappy beer in the first place — the transgender community.

And now Bud Light’s regretting the marketing move. They’ve lost billions of dollars. Boo hoo, baw haw. Let the 1%-ers bail ’em out.

Anheuser-Busch, the maker of crappy Bud Light, can’t even apologize properly.

After throwing in their consumer base’s faces the ridiculous Dylan Mulvaney with his ridiculous pretend-woman skit, and after the Internet came alive with videos of angry Bud Light drinkers pumping bullet after bullet into their Bud Light drink cans — to send their own public relations message of “boycott Bud!” — A-B CEO Brendan Whitworth came back with this: “As the CEO of a company founded in America’s heartland more than 165 years ago, I am responsible for ensuring every consumer feels proud of the beer we brew. We’re honored to be part of the fabric of this country. … blah blah blah … We never intended to be part of a discussion that divides people. We are in the business of bringing people together over a beer … yada, yada, yada … I am focused on building and protecting our remarkable history and heritage.”

Notice the apology?

Yeah. It ain’t there.

And a world of former Bud Light drinkers quickly pointed out that fact. So then A-B’s CEO tried a different tack and called out the Clydesdales. ’Cause big-footed, hairy-hoofed horses trotting in front of American patriotic symbols are sure to get the masses to forget how just yesterday they were being chided, via a fake female face on a can, to accept the lie called transgenderism. Did A-B’s CEO truly think A-B’s core drinkers are that empty-headed of goons?

It’s a marketing flop that’s made in heaven for the competition, that’s for sure. Can you say Schlitz? At least Coke had a way back from New Coke. Bud Light doesn’t stand such a chance — unless — unless — unless — A-B’s CEO first, issues a real apology and second, fires the responsible LGBTQ-pushing parties.

Here’s a sample: “We at Bud Light screwed up and screwed up big time by trying to push a man dressed as a woman as a symbol of good, old-fashioned beer-drinking Americanism. We are sorry. We will never bow to the lie of transgenderism again. And by way of apology, we have fired the pertinent parties who devised this marketing nightmare. Now please accept a free round of Bud Lights as our sincere show of regret and our humble request to return as our customers.”

It’ll still be crappy beer.

But at least it won’t be crappy beer trying to shove a culturally depraved lie onto consumers.

And the alternative is this: Bud Light will be forever known as the beer of the LGBTQ crowd. That ought to earn the company, what, dozens of dollars each year in revenues.

• Cheryl Chumley can be reached at cchumley@washingtontimes.com or on Twitter, @ckchumley. Listen to her podcast “Bold and Blunt” by clicking HERE. And never miss her column; subscribe to her newsletter and podcast by clicking HERE. Her latest book, “Lockdown: The Socialist Plan To Take Away Your Freedom,” is available by clicking HERE  or clicking HERE or CLICKING HERE.