So, based on reports from NBC Sports Washington and various news outlets, the Prince of Darkness is about to be … what, dethroned? Defrocked? Decommissioned?
What is going to happen to Washington Redskins team president Bruce Allen?
At press time, the consensus was that when the sun rises Monday in Ashburn, Allen will no longer be in charge of football operations. The savior from 10 years ago will be shuffled off to … where?
Will he remain team president? Or will he be impeached and given a new title to go along with whatever his new duties will be? Will the day finally arrive where Allen has the brilliant title created years ago by my former colleague and radio talk show host Steve Czaban — director of pants and picnics?
How will Redskins owner Dan Snyder appease the #FireBruceAllen movement and still keep his wings and beer pal around?
Perhaps he will be put in charge of handling the lifeline his pal Snyder is counting on a to save his troubled franchise — a new taxpayer-funded new stadium.
Good luck with that.
There is no traction for a stadium project in Virginia, Maryland or the District, particularly now that Allen’s buddy and the city’s most influential stadium advocate, D.C. Council member Jack Evans, is fighting for his political life and perhaps his freedom.
Snyder might as well give Allen his American Express card, send him to Home Depot to buy tools and supplies, tell him to find a spot on Lot A next to Ghost Town Field and start building. That would keep him busy.
Monday is expected to be a glorious day at Redskins Park — the reassignment of Allen and the announcement of the new football minds in the front office and maybe the coaching staff that will change the “damn good culture” and damn lousy results of this franchise. Heck, Snyder may even have that language written into their contracts as proof that this time, the change is real.
If you listen closely, you might hear Mike Shanahan or Marty Schottenheimer laughing. We’ve seen this Snyder sleight of hand before.
Who will be the puppets of change this time? Former Ohio State coach Urban Meyer? ESPN analyst Louis Riddick (who has been lobbying for the job all year on television)? Stay in-house and promote Kyle Smith or Eric Schaffer? Recently fired Carolina coach Ron Rivera? Former Bengals coach Marvin Lewis? Tampa defensive coordinator and former Redskins safety Todd Bowles? Jets defensive coordinator and former Redskins defensive coordinator Gregg Williams? Chiefs offensive coordinator Eric Bieniemy?
You might think, 18 years since the Schottenheimer hands-off hire and 10 years after the Shanahan hands-off hire, that Snyder would finally find a mirror somewhere and see that he is the common denominator when it comes to the demise of this franchise.
Over those years, though, Redskins fans have come to realize that true change will never happen as long as Snyder owns the team. Many have simply given up and walked away from what was once as much a Sunday tradition as church.
They have accepted real change in their lives. Why can’t Snyder?
I don’t know, maybe Snyder’s good friend Dwayne Haskins can ask, the next time the owner is with him in the locker room, telling him whether he should play or not.
If Allen is not fired outright and exiled from Redskins Park, maybe his new role will be so diminished that he soon will leave on his own.
But there is the school of thought that if Allen is anywhere in the building, he will undermine the new arrivals. See Scot McCloughan. See Brian Lafemina. It is a school of thought shared by many in the #FireBruceAllen movement who no longer are fooled by Snyder’s deceptions.
Even if Allen is fired and vaporized, it’s foolish to expect real change.
Even if they bring in Oscar Mayer, Geraldo Rivera or Huey Lewis, the miserable meddling big boss is still calling the shots.
Even if the Redskins manage to squeeze a new football palace out of taxpayers, Snyder still owns the team.
Until Captain Dan takes his $100 million yacht and goes on a “Gilligan’s Island” three-hour tour, whatever happens Monday is just another puppet show.
⦁ Hear Thom Loverro on 106.7 The Fan Wednesday afternoons and Saturday mornings and on the Kevin Sheehan podcast Tuesdays and Thursdays.
• Thom Loverro can be reached at tloverro@washingtontimes.com.
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