- The Washington Times - Tuesday, March 21, 2017

Two things about James Comey, director of the FBI: He hates the idea of Russia influencing American politics. And he hates the New England Patriots.

The second is worst. After all, anybody can hate Russia — in fact, every patriotic-minded, hot-blooded American should hate Russia. What’s Russia but a waiting-in-the-wing American enemy, anyway? Playing nice, so long as they see us as strong — ready to spread and advance on the international scale as soon as they see us as weak. Witness: Russia during Barack Obama.

But the Patriots? The New England Patriots? Who hates the Patriots but the most unpatriotic of Americans?

The heartbeat of this nation’s in the team name, for crying out loud. Patriots. You know — like the people who fought and died for this country at its founding?

The original tea partiers and all that?

There’s only one reason for Comey’s hatred of the Patriots that makes sense.

Comey must be commie. Just look at his name — Comey. Commie. See what I mean?

And what do communists hate, above all else?

Patriots. Freedom-lovers. Freedom fighters.

But those aren’t the only give-aways. This is what Comey said, during House Intelligence Committee testimony: “I hate the New England Patriots. No matter who they play, I’d like them to lose. And I’m at the same time rooting against the Patriots and hoping their opponent beat them because there’s only two teams on the field.”

You caught that, right? He hates America.

He then later shared this: “By the way, if I’m honest with myself, the reason I don’t like the Patriots is they represent sustained excellence, and as a Giants fan that drives me crazy.”

How about that — did you catch that?

He’s a Giants fan. And as every football fan who also follows politics on a daily basis knows: Giants is a euphemism for Russia. Which, of course, is a euphemism for Communist. And once again, for those who haven’t been paying attention: Comey’s last name, translated first in German and then Spanish, and back into English via the Olde English route, is spelled C-o-m-m-i-e.

That he hates the Patriots — and the Patriots hail from New England, the birthplace of America’s patriotic founding — is just another piece of the puzzle sliding into place. It all makes sense now.

And then we have the “Missing” Tom Brady jersey. I just want to know one thing: Where was James Comey on the evening of February 5, 2017?

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