ANALYSIS/OPINION
A Memphis teenager asked a random stranger in a grocery store to help him buy groceries for himself and his disabled mother. Matt White took an interest, got involved, man and boy bonded, and, in two weeks, $103,000 was raised to help the family. They are now on their way to raising enough money to buy the family a home.
How’s that for taking control and making a difference?
The tsunami of political rhetoric on both sides of the Atlantic — and on both sides of the political divide as well — is a response to the emotional state of the electorate. What is that emotional state? Frustration and its close buddy, anger. People are frustrated by a lack in their lives of what social scientists call “agency,” the ability to take independent action and effect meaningful change. That so many resonate to the cry, “The deck is stacked against us!” means people feel blocked from exercising significant influence on their own lives and in their own communities.
The easy way to cope with lack of agency is to find someone or something to blame. A more difficult, but more constructive way to cope is to become politically active, especially at the local level. But if politics is not your cup of tea, there is another way to take control of your life. It’s a proven method that will impact your family, your community, and will increase your feelings of personal control. It will also make you happier. The method is this: Give to others.
Nothing can compare to the sense of agency you get from giving. When you volunteer your time and money to a worthwhile project you become empowered. You make a difference. You may still be frustrated, but now your frustration is channeled into making positive change.
Psychological research shows that giving time and money to others results in a wide range of positive benefits … to the giver, the receiver, and the larger community as well. In one study, volunteers were given an envelope with money in it to spend that day. Half the subjects were instructed to spend the money on themselves and the other half to give it as a charitable donation or gift. At the end of the day those who spent money on others had a higher level of happiness than those who spent it on themselves
It’s no wonder, then, that over the past 20 years research has demonstrated that volunteering is linked with a reduced risk of depression, a higher amount of overall satisfaction in life, and in some studies, even a reduced risk of death! We feel most alive when we recognize our personal agency — that is, when we are confident that we can act and make a difference.
The benefits of giving to others extend beyond the immediate. Giving is contagious, your generosity creates a ripple effect of generosity that impacts further than you might imagine. A study by James Fowler published in the proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences showed that when one person behaves generously it inspires others to behave generously later, toward different people. In other words, the sense of agency that you have received from giving and helping others is dynamic and “pays forward,” making the world better bit by bit.
Muhammad Ali, once a very angry man, transformed his anger into a constructive force. He was well known for saying “Service to others is the rent you pay for your room in heaven.”
Most of us will help in what we consider to be small ways: participate in a school fundraiser, become a Big Brother, take a turn at the soup kitchen, or just ask a neighbor if they need something at the store. But one can never predict what will result when we are open to opportunities to help and give.
Matt White happened to be at a supermarket in Memphis when an unknown teenage boy approached him asking for help. Now a family’s life is transformed. That’s making a difference.
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