OPINION:
ANALYSIS/OPINION:
Finally, an authoritative voice has weighed in on the Scottish independence question.
“Both sides of this argument have valid points — the freedom-loving heirs of the Highland tradition, and those who enjoy crawling like worms beneath British boots,” said Dr. William MacDougal, a Scot from Kirkwall in the Orkney Islands.
But the doctor said “the most recent polling shows we are split 50-50 on the matter, and I am hesitant to throw my support to either side, be it the right one — or the obviously wrong one!”
Still, he sought to bolster “those who are skeptical of Scottish independence.” And while he offered an endorsement of sorts for Alex Salmond as leader if Scotland splits off from the United Kingdom, he also offered another option. “For a leader who can stand in the proud tradition of William Wallace and Andy Murray, won’t you consider the return of Scotland’s prodigal son — Groundskeeper Willie?”
That’s right, Dr. William MacDougal is Groundskeeper Willie from the iconic TV show “The Simpsons,” famous for dubbing the French as the “cheese-eating surrender monkeys.” And while he makes a few jokes in his short video released over the weekend — “Willie won’t back down to world leaders, because I haven’t a clue who they are and I’m not willing to learn” — at least one point Willie makes is spot on.
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“Scotland is the home to two-thirds of Europe’s oil reserves,” he says.
Even more, Scotland would get to keep 90 percent of the United Kingdom’s oil, with its huge reserves located in the North Sea. And another plus, Scotland says it would be saddled with only 8 percent of the national debt (based on its share of the population). While the British government disagrees, it might be hard to force Scotland to pay should Scots vote for independence.
So although they’ve been together for some 300 years, Scotland could well split off from the rest of Britain next week. At this point, the Scottish independence referendum is “too close to call,” according to the Telegraph newspaper in London. Still, two polls conducted in the last week came to two different conclusions.
The Telegraph’s own survey of 705 Scots found the independence supporters leading by 8 points, while another telephone poll of 1,000 Scots found just independence trailing by exactly the same margin.
“Polls can and do go up and down and the fuss an individual poll makes will soon be forgotten when the real result arrives,” said Martin Boon, head of ICM Research, which conducted the latter poll. “The proper way to analyse this poll is simply to take it as an ’outlier’ which fits into the overall impression created by all Scottish polls right now: It seems too close to call, and could go either way.”
Meanwhile, a third poll taken for the Observer put the “no” campaign ahead by a 6-point margin, and Alistair Darling, head of the group Better Together, said the tide has turned in his group’s favor.
SEE ALSO: Momentum builds in Scotland for breakaway from U.K.
“We will win, and I know that because I can see our returns,” he told the Guardian newspaper. “We will win, be in no doubt about it. I know, because I see them every day, our returns are good.”
Still, Scots are unhappy with London and the massive amounts of money the government spends. If they do split from Britain, they very well could get the better of the deal. On the other hand, Scotland might not remain members of the United Nations, NATO or the European Union, and questions about its currency are unanswered. What’s more, the United Kingdom would lose clout with the departure of Scotland.
The whole thing is fascinating to watch. Very seldom are there such peaceful divorces in world politics. Scotland, which became a unified country in the 9th century, has just 5.6 million inhabitants, so it would be like Missouri or Maryland or Wisconsin leaving the U.S.
If Scots vote for independence on Thursday, the split will come on March 24, 2016. And who will be the next Scottish leader?
Don’t rule out Groundskeeper Willie. He might just be the right man at the right time. As he said: “I’ve lived in America most of my life, so I’ve seen first hand how not to run a country.” We all know how true that is.
• Joseph Curl covered the White House and politics for a decade for The Washington Times. He can be reached at josephcurl@gmail.com and on Twitter @josephcurl.
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