HUMPHRIES: Liberal Bully of the Week

OPINION:

With shock and sadness, the Internal Revenue Service announced that the emails of Lois Lerner — the IRS official sacrificed by the Obama administration as the only possible source for the “accidental” IRS attacks on Tea Party and other right leaning groups — from 2009 to 2011 were lost in a computer “hard drive crash” in early summer 2011.

It is quite a coincidence that the now-missing emails, just happened to be from the years when the targeting of conservative groups took place. Pay no attention to the fact that emails aren’t just stored on local hard drives, but are also stored on big computer servers, and forget that each email sent is usually an email received by some another party. Nope, these emails are gone, destroyed. Don’t even look for them, Congress. A super-powerful creature targeted that data, and for the first time in history, hundreds of electronic messages are gone, never to be seen again.

Sarah Palin made a great point on Facebook this week: “Remember the 18-minute gap in Nixon’s White House tapes during the Watergate scandal? Now Obama’s IRS top dog claims a communications gap of 1,052,000 minutes. Hmm. Wonder if the press will recognize similarities?”

Well, the answer to your question Sarah, is no, the press hasn’t noticed, because, according to the media Palace Guard, there’s nothing to see here.

There can only be one explanation for the lack of logic and accountability by this administration, and I place the blame squarely at the feet of President Obama. Denizens of this administration has believed from Day One that the rules do not apply to them. Not the rules of separation of powers, not the rules of public transparency, and apparently not the most important rules of all.

Those are the rules for handling a Mogwai from the classic 1984 film “Gremlins.”

After hearing all the theories being thrown around about how a string of bizarre computer malfunctions wiped out vital evidence relevant to the greatest political abuse of power in decades, not just for Ms. Lerner but for six other key figures in the IRS scandal, the only possible answer must be: Out-of-control gremlins had a party at the Cincinnati IRS office and destroyed everything in their wake. The Obama administration, in an attempt to keep the lid on the little green monsters, concocted the “computer crash” theory to keep the public from panicking.

I appreciate the attempt by “the most transparent administration in history” to keep us safe. But please, Mr. President, you must remember to play by the rules:

Never expose a Mogwai to bright light (especially sunlight, which will kill him); never get him wet; and, most importantly, no matter how much he cries or begs, never, ever feed him after midnight.

I have a bad feeling that late one night, after a long evening of partying with Jay-Z, Stevie Wonder and Eva Longoria at the White House, Mr. Obama caved and fed a whining Mogwai some leftover caviar, Wagyu beef or lobster, just to shut it up. That hungry Mogwai must have turned into an evil gremlin. Then he jumped into the White House pool, multiplied into a horde of gremlins, and headed to the Cincinnati IRS office, where the pack of little green troublemakers threw a party, tore up the place, crashed computers, and wiped out all those sensitive emails from the years 2009-11.

Those wicked little monsters are evil, indeed. For the destruction of government property, the attempt to stifle a congressional investigation into IRS abuse of power against American citizens, and for all-around naughty behavior, Mr. Obama’s gremlins are the liberal bullies of the week.

Rusty Humphries, a nationally syndicated talk-radio host, is a contributor to The Washington Times.