- Wednesday, June 19, 2024

Dear Dr. E: I just graduated from college this past May, and I’d like to know if you can give me any advice as I start my job search and, well, move on with life. Do you have any secrets to success you’d like to share? — GEN Z ADMIRER FROM AFAR

Dear Gen Z: A pastor once told me how common it is for terminally ill people to confess their regrets to him. They regret they didn’t spend more time with their family. They regret that they had not taken more initiative. They wish they had done more that truly mattered. Never once did anyone ever say they wished they had watched more football. No one ever said they wished they’d spent more time on social media. No one wishes they had slept in more on Sunday mornings. No one ever says they wish they had given less money and time to their church.

At the risk of stating the obvious, you have one life. You have one chance. A. W. Tozer once said it well. “When you kill time, remember that it has no resurrection.”

At this stage of your life, do what’s challenging rather than comfortable. Have the courage to try. Teddy Roosevelt summed it up well: “Courage is not having the strength to go on; it is going on when you don’t have the strength. Industry and determination can do anything that genius and advantage can do and many things they cannot.” 

The first step is to work. Rather than waiting for a handout, take matters into your own hands. Take a job, any job. Don’t expect to be a CEO in your first year out of college. Start at the bottom if necessary. Earn your position. Earn your promotion. Put in the hard work, learn the hard lessons, and work your way up. Remember, it’s your responsibility to take care of yourself. Stop expecting others to take care of you.

The second step is to learn to give rather than take. It’s not all about you. In fact, very little is about you. It’s about who you see out the window rather than who you see in the mirror. 

One of the most significant rewards you will ever receive is to give to others and expect nothing in return. Charles Dickens said, “No one is useless in this world who lightens the burdens of another.”

Your job helps you to earn a living. Giving helps you learn how to live. Be a bellringer for the Salvation Army at Christmas. Volunteer to clean up at a homeless shelter. Serve in a soup kitchen. Give away your money, then earn more to give away more. You will not receive a paycheck for doing any of this, but you are making an investment you will not regret. Remember the admonition of St. Francis of Assisi: “Keep a clear eye toward life’s end. Do not forget your purpose and destiny as God’s creatures. What you are in His sight is what you are and nothing more. Remember that when you leave this earth, you can take nothing that you have received … but only what you have given.”

The third step is to find a way to be a hero. Another way to say it is to look for someone who needs a mentor. Most of our present cultural influence comes from academia, the media, and Hollywood’s “elite” class. It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to see that nearly everything they offer is misguided, shallow, and counterproductive. It is selfish rather than selfless. It champions entitlement. It focuses on blame and offense. It promotes victimization and vice. If you do the opposite, you will stand out like a sore thumb. You will be counter-cultural. You will be seen and heard. Lead, and others will follow. 

Be a mentor. Be a Big Brother or Big Sister. Volunteer as a tutor. Lead a church youth group. Lead. Let others see the joy that comes from living with integrity, courage, and service in the hopes that they may do the same for others who will then choose to follow them. Idowu Koyenikan once said, “Show me the heroes that the youth of your country look up to, and I will tell you the future of your country.”

So, the bottom line is this: The secret to success is really no secret at all. First, do the hard work. Second, give more and take less. And finally, live for others and not yourself: Be a hero. 

If you are seeking guidance in today’s changing world, Higher Ground is there for you. Everett Piper, a Ph.D. and a former university president and radio host, takes your questions in his weekly ’Ask Dr. E’ column. If you have moral or ethical questions for which you’d like an answer, please email askeverett@washingtontimes.com and he may include it in a future column.

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